"Do you think she's gonna come back?" we were nursing a pot of sakura tea between us. The Japanese restaurant, despite hearing mixed feedback from other friends who patroned the place before was pleasant.

"Nopehh." She purposely added the 'pehh' to make a single syllable word two.

"For Christmas?" I asked again.

"You won't be there beside her." She quipped.

"Maybe she'll call." I said.

"You'd turn blue."

"I wasn't gonna hold my breath." Flustered.

"Yeah you would." I love-hate she knew me so well. It's like she's in my head. "You still have her stuffs?"

I nodded. I had plans to return them over the weekend but there were excuses.

"and... you're still taking care of it?" she nudged the word 'it' a little strong. I knew what she meant. It wasn't our idea to get a pet together, she got it for herself. Never had a chance to disagree because the decision was already made.

"I'm not sure what I should do about it." I honestly don't. Pets need that care and attention from their humans, not just simply feeding. Hers, was especially social. I ended up taking care of it. On one hand, returning it would take the responsibility off of my shoulders; but on the other I know it won't get enough attention in her house.

"Return it. It's not yours to keep. You can't even travel anymore because of it. Speaking of travel, what are you gonna do with the trip? It's in a couple of weeks, right?" Yeah I arranged a trip to the highlands with her on the weekend of her birthday. It was supposed to be a surprise, I'm half glad I haven't told her yet.

"I was gonna cancel the bookings." It was a lovely cottage with a smokehouse - not exactly common in this country. Surrounded by multiple flower gardens: lavenders, tulips, lilies, roses of all colours. There's strawberry farms where you pay a sum and eat all the strawberries. Apples, grapes too. There's even a Time Capsule Museum, I know she would appreciate that because she loves museums!

"while hoping she'd call you up and then you'd have the chance to bring it up in a conversation and she'll be all grateful and would get back with you."

"I really was." She sniggered and emptied her cup. She's starting to get antsy, probably itching for a cigarette. I poured her another cup, the smell of sakura flowers wafting between us.

"Look, you're the nicest, sweetest, most generous, selfless, romantic, heartiest person I know.."

"Thanks you." I raised my cup and drank.

"... but you're also in denial..." I placed my cup, there quarters empty, back on it's tiny mat that serves as a coaster. It looked so cute and well placed. "... which is fine. Denial is the first stage of moving on. You can hope that she'll call you tomorrow, text you the next hour, maybe leave a comment on your Facebook or like one of your Instagram photos..." She looked straight into my eyes. "but she hasn't since when?"

"About a month.." my voice trailed.

"A month. Before the two of you broke up, the only conversation you had with each other was about cats and babies, and that was purely sending each other one video after another."

"Yeah." I couldn't disagree.

"She never asked about how it was doing. She never asked about how you're doing for that matter. She never talked about herself with you since she left. She told just about everyone else about her apartment, her job, her colleagues. Heck she told me about her coffee machine and she couldn't tell you where she lives! No, not couldn't, wouldn't. She made her decision long before she told you. She was just keeping you around for plan B."

I was at loss of words. You'd think if my heart was a china shop she's the bull that ran rampage, but this is her picking up the pieces after. The bull had already left.

"Look, I loved seeing you two together. It's the first time I actually saw you take pride in a relationship - not to say the ones you had were a shame. I just thought you two belonged together."

"It was as real as it could get. For me at least."

"... but like I told you, we're all looking for the next best thing. I say this for your own good, but I really hope she dumped you for another guy, because if she left you for reasons that is who you are right now..."

"I know. Please don't finish that sentence." I've lost or had to gave up so many things. Her leaving was ice on a burnt cake.

"You're gonna get through. You always do. But for now, you just have to give her up and let her go."

"I know..."

"And the first thing you're gonna do is gather up all her stuffs. Every physical thing that could remind you of her. You're gonna pack them nicely, and return it to her. Or at least her brother since she's never coming back."

"Will you help?"

"What do you think, dummy. Of course I'll help. Now can we please move outdoors. I need a puff." She stood abruptly and started to put on her shoes. I couldn't help but smile. What would I do without her.

Well I overexaggerate.. I have 31 WhatsApp group. Yes, THIRTY ONE! I counted once, twice, three times to make sure. Some of you may have less, some of you may have more. I can't speak for you, but me, I've silenced over half of them - for a year. When I do go about clearing the notifications, I would rarely read. I simply tap and hold, and tap clear all messages.

"... why not just leave?"

Because the group was *sceptically* work related, event related etc. etc. I get pop-up notifactions everytime a message in WhatsApp. I would glance to find someone selling something or another, and would simply brush it off.

"... what if there are important bits of information"

... which is directly related to me, people would text me personally or give me a call.

It annoys me most when I get friends promoting one of their products or services. All the "alternatives ways to remove fat, pm me" and "promotion promotion, rm xxx only", I literally clear them off. Yes, even if you're sitting next to me.

Why? The same reason you would toss promotional leaflets into bins. There is NO PERSONAL TOUCH. Fine, you say you're casting the net wide, I'll say throw a good lure and catch a bigger fish.

You say 'help me promote'; then please, word it personally. I would gladly go to my other WhatsApp group and say 'hey, a friend of mine is selling this and this, anyone of you here care to take a look?" IF and ONLY IF you personally ask me 'Hey Rool, could you do me a favor and help me promote this product that I have?'

I'm not saying I'm The Majesty that you have to PERSONALLY ask for favor. If we're friends in the first place, it shouldn't be much of an effort to ask, would it? Add a little compliment here and there, maybe start off with a joke, make me feel like I'm receiveing a message from a friend rather than a text promoting whatever!

You spent so much time typing out the longest wordiest text to promote your product, but took for granted the way you promote them. I'll let you in on a little secret - the best way to promote your product is to get people to ask about it.

"Hey, you know what, I'm starting a book," you say. Any socially competent person, especially a friend would ask you "What book?"

Then you might want to say "Nah but you dont have a child. You might not be interested." That's already telling me that they target audience for the book are parents with children. What age? For boys, for girls? What is it about? I'm getting interested, even if I don't have a child.

After a few exchanges, you say "So yeah. I'm actually selling it for RMxx. Do you mind spreading the word?"

I would definitely say of course! I'll even write a blog about it!

"...look, whether it's another guy, a nice title on a new and fancy business card, fat salary, a new city.." she paused and took another swig of her beer. "... fact of the matter is that you got dumped ..."

ouch..

"... sure it was delivered calmly. You discussed about it. But was it you who said it's not working out? " She paused and casually took a stick out of the Pall Mall and brought it to her mouth. "Were you the one who gave up and said you've had enough?" Finally bringing the stick to her lips and lit it.

I haven't said a word.

"Yeah. In fact, you said that you yourself is in a shithole, and that you were hoping for her to be there waiting for you when you pull yourself out." She took a puff. "... to which she said 'I'm glad you got my message..' was it? She never answered. She's made a decision then."

She looked at me. "Dude, she probably made a decision to leave you when she left here. Big fat salary, a nice title on her namecard, her own place. Let's not forget she's quite a looker too, fair skin, beautiful eyes."

"hey!" that was a double-hit.

"yeah no, I mean you're going through a tough time, and you do look good when you dress up. What I'm saying is at this very moment, she's climbing high and you're probably weighing her down so logically, she'd cut you off."

"Is that what you think?" what-if's hurts, that's why I let other people ask it.

"There could be another guy, I mean you dont have to tell me but just days - DAYS - after you broke up her social media lit up. I saw."

I honestly don't think thats true. She took another puff.

"I mean not a third person when you're together. Maybe she's decided to look for someone better than you." Half the cigarette was gone by now.

"Remember what I told you? Don't hate someone or something so much, you'll most likely turn into that person or thing. Shit I must be drunk now." she took a long gulp and emptied her glass. "She hated her uncle, yes? For leaving the dog behind? Well, look at what she left you?"

Even in her drunken stupor she deliver the most precise point. I flicked a tab to the bartender passing by to refill her glass. She puffed her ciggy and looked around.

"Look.. you know me, and you know I'm not gonna stop until I've had my say. So you listen here." The bartender came with her beer and cleared our table which started to look like there's 7 of us drinking. "They asked you to stay in touch because the family knows you, yes?" I nodded. "When was the last time she said hi?" I thought back. "What about her brother? Did he bother to say sorry?"

"Well he didn't do anything wrong," I quipped.

"You prick. Not sorry as in to apologize. Sorry as in sympathy. I know it don't spread around thick among guys but if he's a guy he should know what it feels like too, right?"

"Yeah..."

"Instead he mocked you.. not in a bro-dude kinda way." Another puff and she went on speaking with smokes going out of her nosedrills, a vision of a mother dragon. "What I'm saying is that she doesn't mean it. Even if she does, remember what you said about exes?"

"I don't keep them around."

"Burn the bridge. Burn it to hell. You were dumped. Be sad about it, or dont. Be mad about it, or dont. Grieve, don't grieve. Cry, yell, shout, be silent, speak up, open up, bottle it in - do whatever you need to." She palmed the table to emphasize her point. "..take as much time as you need, go wherever you feel like going. You booked a nice holiday with her right? Go alone, go with friends - hell, take me! I've never been to Genting! Or don't go!"

Pretty sure we're gaining some attention from other people in the pub by this time, but I got her point. Doesn't matter what I do, I just have to decide and stick to the decision.

"The point is ..." I'll let her say it anyways "... you decide, you do, then you move on."

I raised my glass and she met it with a loud clink. "Let's drink to that."

I would actually go as far as calling it a theme for this year's Rainforest World Music Festival - but this is my own opinion. I counted 4 vocally-centered performers, and two-and-a-third (because Epi is part of a trio and) of them are throat singers. Each, however, has their own style and unique background that makes the variety all the more interesting.

In this entry, I would like to focus on sisters Karin and Kathy Kettler. Together they form Nukariik, and coming from the Inuit Tribe. The both flew (on separate flights, one of which significantly longer than the other) from Canada to bring their Inuit throat singing, a little bit of drumming and a little game to the Rainforest World Music Festival Theatre Stage.

If you've read my previous post on RWMF'16 Highlights here, then you'll know how little time I had to prepare, do some Googling, listen to some of the performers music and decide on which workshop to go to. Nukariik was a simple choice - it's a must.

On two occasions throughout the festival I had the chance to sit and talk with the sisters (or one of them - Karin I think; over dinner at the performer's and media area) and they are both so humble, so down to earth and so genuine. Their heritage is from the Kangiqsualujjuaq, Nunavik, in northern Quebec - and I was told if I want to visit, middle of the year is probably best as it's not as cold as the rest of the year.

(From a guy that has spent his whole life in the tropics, your definition of cold is probable equal to mine freezing even before landing! LOL)

When asked about the origins of the Inuit throat singing, the sisters took turns explaining that it had begun as a pastimes and were inspired by the sounds that they hear all around them. Normally sang between two ladies while the men go hunting, the songs are loosely simple and rhythmic, consisting of one or more syllable or sound on the breath out, and another on a breath in. Harmonizing these simple rhythm produces an complex and sophisticated structure, and more often than not really represents what they are singing about.

Case and point: The Saw.

It really does sound like a saw going back and forth on a log!

Another song that was equally captivating was the Song for Our Father. Also note that the duo likes to compete going back-and-forth trying to throw each other off the melody; and as a result almost all of their songs accellerando until one of them ran out of breath or burst into laughter.

It's also very endearing to see such sisterly bond brought on-stage as they perform, and it does stay true to the root of the Inuit throat singing as well I presume - to bring people closer together.

Song for Our Father

Do you recognize the melody? Comment if you do! 

What had captivated me most was the song about the Inukshuk, a monument made of raw stones that has multiple purposes. I guess back in the days when the land was so vast, travelling from one point to another is a challenge and whenever they can they will leave inuksuit (the plural form of inukshuk) to point to a direction or places where there is food. Sometimes inuksuit are erected as a monument to a loved ones too.

Inukshuk

Along with English translation!

Later in the day as I caught up with a fellow blogger (Lindy, show yourself please) once again I met the sisters at the Doodle wall! By then my camera had died and we were so engaged in conversation that we forgot to snap photos together! They even gave me a copy of the Canada's Inuit Youth Magazine before we part ways.

Maybe we can learn something out of this.

They're in Inuit language, I think.
Luckily there is an English translation too. 

I've compiled the videos that I shot during their performance at this year's Rainforest World Music Festival into a YouTube playlist here. Enjoy it, and don't forget to SUBSCRIBE to my channel, press that LIKE button and SHARE it to all your friends and family.

Ladies, it had been a pleasure meeting you both. All the best in your next performances.

It was a last minute invitation, I barely had any time to prepare and ended up with about 40 gigabytes of footage across the three days festival! It's a whole lot different this year - reorienting itself to be a family and kid-friendly event with workshops specifically designed for kids - the PUSAKA Bookaroo workshop.

That said, I was at one (ok.. maybe more than one) of that workshop because hey, there's always a kid in each and every one of us, right? Can't argue with that! hahaha

But This year's festival performers were extraordinary! Last year we witnesses Epi with his secrets to Mongolian throat / overtone singing. This year he came as part of a trio ensemble Violons Barbares (translated as Barbaric Violins), and along with him are sisters Karin and Kathy Kettler as Nukariik from Canada; and Torgeir Vassvik from Norway. For the more contemporary vocal experiences, Vocal Sampling was the crowd's favorite on the second night with their own rendition of Hotel California. This quintet performers carried no instruments with them, and relied solely on their vocals to draw out the sounds of different kinds of instruments!

My personal favorite would be Nukariik. The sisters represents the Inuit tribe and brought along their Inuit heritage, in particular their throat singing which is very different from the other throat singers I mentioned before. Used in the old days as a mean to pass time, they sing to emulate the sounds they hear from around them, thus coming up with songs like the Mosquito, the Saw and the River.

Like I said earlier, this is just the highlights. Head over to my channel and click on the LIKE button on this video if you want to see a day to day highlight! Don't forget to share and SUBSCRIBE!

For so many years I've heard of the famous Floating Buffet at BCCK, Kuching. For so many years I thought about going. And for so many years I never actually went. When I did this year, I completely forgot about the Floating Buffet!

I guess I'm a little traditional in that sense, to be seated at the table (and stay seated in conversation) before iftar. That's just me though, so when the buffet made it's grand entry, I was a little way off to get a good footage.

That said, the rest of the servings that night was so grand, I wanted to taste each and every one of them - in very very small portions.

Here are some of my favorites! Don't forget to click LIKE, SHARE and SUBSCRIBE!